a bone to pick

i've been determined recently to batch cook on sundays to cover our meals (lunch and dinner) for the whole week.  last sunday, amongst other things, i baked up 8 salmon fillets that were really quite delicious, if i do say so myself.

 

that is, until i unwillingly swallowed a fish bone during lunch today and it got stuck in my throat.

 

i can't remember the last time that had happened, but definitely remember how irritating it feels.

 

after attempting to clear my throat, cough it up, swallow repeatedly, and even stick my finger down as far as i could get it without gagging (okay, maybe some gagging), i did what i normally do in any interesting predicament.

 

i googled it.

 

the search for fish bone stuck in throat yielded a bunch of insightful home remedies.  here are some of my favorites (from www.home-remedies-for-you.com):

 

• Fill your mouth with as many marshmallows as you can, but make sure that you can chew them easily. Marshmallows normally have a thick and spongy texture and they become sticky, when you chew on them. Chew the marshmallows just a bit, so that they are sticky and can be swallowed without choking. Swallowing the big, sticky lump of marshmallows should take the fish bone down. Once the marshmallow clears your esophagus, check if the bone is still stuck in your throat. If necessary, you can repeat this exercise with another mouthful of marshmallows. Drink big gulps of water between each time you swallow.
• Apply a thick layer of peanut butter to a large piece of bread and chew on it. Swallow the bread while it is still a bit sticky. Instead of peanut butter on bread, you can also chew on a mouthful of nuts like peanuts, almonds, walnuts and pecans before swallowing them. Even after being well-chewed, these nuts remain coarse in texture and their roughness may loosen the fishbone. Wash all the nuts down your throat with big sips of water before trying again. 
• Boil a few olives in a glass of cool water and drink the juice slowly, while it is still hot. This remedy usually softens the bone and causes it to slide down the throat within a couple of minutes. Alternately, try to drink a few sips of warm olive oil, as it will have a soothing effect on the minor cuts in your throat, caused by the fish bone. 
• Bite off a large piece of banana and just hold it in your mouth for a minute or two, so that it gets moistened. Swallow the entire chunk, without chewing it at all. You may need to have a large drink of water to swallow the banana more easily.

 

as i didn't have any marshmallows, bread, peanut butter, or a banana on hand, i settled for the olive oil trick.  and since i didn't really have any of that either, i thought the closest thing was some of the hummus i had packed.  i mean, hummus is made with olive oil, right?  and so i subjected myself to swallowing some of the glop slowly.  to no avail.  should i add an "of course," here?

 

then i proceeded to gulp down a ton of water, which also had no effect.  that darn thing was really stuck in there.

 

so i looked up a couple more DIY remedies, resigned to try some at home, ridiculous as they sounded.  and you know what?  getting a good laugh in was probably the best remedy of all.  at least it kept my mind off the prickly feeling for awhile, until i realized i couldn't feel it anymore.

 

cured.