pro...gression

One year ago to the day, I started adjuvant cancer therapy consisting of an aromatase inhibitor in the form of a pill + ovarian suppression in the form of a monthly injection in the stomach. The AI mercilessly gives me joint pain and the injection causes hot flashes; essentially i’m in a clinically induced menopause so get to feel the effects of it.

Last year, I was anxious and overwhelmed, sick of needles (especially after enduring several rounds of IVF) and feeling like there was no end to treatment in sight. This year, I breeze in and out of my infusion appointments, asking for the glove of ice and freezy spray, no longer having to brace myself for the shot. Though not fun, the injections are tolerable (even more so when the nurse doesn’t remind me of how big the needle is or how they don’t particularly like administering the shot), while the side effects remain.. well, pretty unforgiving.

I won’t know until my next hem/onc appointment how much longer I’ll be on this regimen, but I try to no longer associate it with a timeframe or end goal. I’ve managed this first year, as hard as it was. My hair has grown to be the same length that my wig had been. I've made changes to my diet and add activity when I can. I feel like I’ve achieved something, quietly, without the fanfare or notoriety of active treatment. Small steps, and progress.