we're still getting up to run at the same time, but i can already see and feel the days changing. soon, it will be completely dark by the time we make it to the trail, but for now it's dim, the trees casting eerie shadows along the path. the sky doesn't brighten until i've run the first mile (which curves into the woods and over a bridge), and turned around and made it to the first clearing. this is when i've crossed the line between what feels like dreaming and wakefulness.
a few workouts ago, on the particular foggy morning, i made it past the first mile marker when i was overcome by a stillness that is almost impossible to describe. the river was calm and the milky fog hovered over the water, hugging its surface, but not touching. i thought this exemplified what it's like to see and experience an "in between" state.
i guess this "stuck in the middle" sense can be applied to today as well. it was my coworker's last day so we threw him an after-work thing. it reminded me of my farewell party at my previous job and how everyone came out to wish me well. at the time, i had felt like my foot was out one door and in the other, unable to take a step forward until i was essentially ready to shift the balance.
i've realized that there are alot of circumstances in life that are not entirely clear or lucid, black or white; there's alot in the middle that's blurred into grey.
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